Tim had to travel to Atlanta this week for an OSHA refresher course.  I told him last week, “I’m going to be so lonely when you are gone.  I think that you should give me some shopping money…  shopping would really take my mind off things…”   He said he’d think about it…  and maybe I would get some money under my pillow (the shopping fairy?).

So yesterday morning, I was so tired and forgot to look under my pillow!  It was “business as usual” – morning routines to get ready for work.  I flipped the light on in the main bath so that I could dry my hair and put makeup on…  what did I find taped to my mirror?  A fan shaped, 5 bill pile…  I counted mentally, “One, two, three, four, five…  Oh, Tim gave me $100!”  But it took me a minute to realize…  those were not 20’s.  They were 100’s.  I had 5 – $100 bills!  I was so excited, just couldn’t stand myself.

Yesterday I went home from work sick because of cramps.  Ick.  Normally, my cramps for that time of month arrive on Saturday every month…  but last dose, I accidentally put the patch on a day or two late.  That meant it pushed my cycle back a few days.  *Note to self:  Thursdays should always REMAIN the day to put on a birth control patch so that I don’t have to miss work.

Later in the evening, 7:00 pm, I decided to run to Ross Dress For Less.  While there, I ran into a friend who was trying to find a dress for a dinner party.  She showed me her selections, and told me that she had a size 10 dress.  “You’re not a size 10! You’re a 4!” I exclaimed.  She showed me some of the styles of dresses, and how small they were, even though the labels say 10.  The material is stretchy for one thing…  so it has quite a bit of give.  She went off to the dressing room, and I was on my way to the check out with a belt. Next thing I know, I found myself standing in the size 8 – 10 dresses browsing around.

This is a good time to interject that in the past, I have REFUSED to even glance “that way” on the size 8s!  Anything greater than 6 would not have gained my attention.  After all, I didn’t lose 135 lbs to buy a size 8 or 10 dress…  not when my frame can get into a 4 or 6.  That would be… backsliding!  BUT, since I had a brand new pair of beautiful gold shoes that I purchases this weekend…  and there was nothing compatible in 4s and 6s…  hmmmm, why not at least TRY some of those 8s and 10s on?

I made my way to the dressing room with a pile.  I tried on one dress, size 10.  I yelled for my friend to come look.  She said, “You need a shorter dress.”  So I tried on dress #2, a sleeveless V-neck and V-back with black ruffles down the front and the V-section was in a gold, brown, black design.  Oh, it fit like a beauty!  I loved it…  and when I came out, she said, “You have to buy that dress!”

So I made my way out of Ross Dress for Less with a $14.99 brand name garment (yay!) that was stylish, sexy, and yes…  a size 10.  But, somehow that size 10 dress liberated me from feelings of fear and the refusal to attempt something new.  I like my size 10 dress.  (Now, if I had NEEDED a size 10 dress…  THAT would have shaken my world).

Note:  the picture above is the style of my dress.  But, below the V where the ruffles are, my dress is all black.  And, the V material is a pattern of gold, brown, and black.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 13th, 2010 at 8:30 am and is filed under Reality Check. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.